If you didn’t understand the first two times that I’ve dropped it on the blog, we joined a gym in November…
Then we went home for Thanksgiving, gained four pounds (thanks a lot Chrissy for filling your entire house with candy. thanks a lot mom for making a perfect Thanksgiving meal), and fell off the wagon. While I spent the better part of the week after Thanksgiving upset, I ultimately settled on two things…
- I’m far beyond where I was at this time last year.
- I’m never going to be as small as I used to be.
Both of these, are okay.
First, last year. Our first year living outside of mom & dad’s house, provided us with draining bank accounts and unlimited beer and Cheetos. We would eat a hearty meal nightly, followed by a snack, followed by “not wanting to go down to the gym”, followed by binge watching TV until bed and then doing it all over again the next day. We went from working 50 hours a week on our feet, to being pretty much sedentary and not handling it well. Last year, around Christmas, we went home to our families knowing full well how big we had gotten (23 pounds each…) & decided that there was nothing to do but continue to spiral downward. Thank goodness that we had a mental wake up call mid-January and jumped on it.
Second, “Past Jen”. Like above, living at home was filled with constant working, constant movement, little stress, and over two hours a day to spend in the gym. That Jen doesn’t exist anymore, but this Jen does. While I work upwards of 50 hours a week, I’m doing so in my very own office, where I sit and binge Bravo tv shows, and only get up to go bother Greg, Dylan, or Nick. Or to eat. Although, I do have a drawer in my office that’s know as “The Grocery Store” where you can find anything from Snickers bars to mashed potatoes. I’m not kidding.
That Jen who worked in a gym, and had two hours after work to workout has been replaced with a Jen who’s so tired by 6pm, she barely gets an hour in before she’s asleep on the floor of the gym. And that’s okay. It’s all about balancing and embracing what my body is now, and since I’m not 100% content, I’ll continue to work on this body until I am. (Also, doesn’t always help that work is constantly filled with free food, the sales floor brings me to lunch with them, and I eat and breathe queso…)
As for you, those of you who aren’t happy with your weight gain from stress, life, food, lack of willpower to sit in a gym for two hours, it’s okay. You may have been a skinny little child in high school, but it’s just that. You were a child. You didn’t have to go through everything that happened to you when life happened. Just remember, this year is almost over. If you’re like me and spent an entire year in a body you didn’t like, well, you’ve got about two more weeks to sit on that and then really do something with your new year.
In 2011, I made a New Years Resolution that I stuck to. It was a HARD path of about 4 years, but I lose of 100 pounds. In 2015, I lost control of my body dealing with life. I didn’t know how to handle the things that were being thrown at me, and I coped the wrong way. In 2016, I took control of my body again. I lost 20 pounds, I gained a little bit of confidence back, and I am ending the year in “prepare for wedding” mode.
2017 could be the year that YOU take your body back. Don’t give up.